Because Traffic Cones Solve Everything

Let’s kick this off with one of my favorite subjects– vehicle parking.

21130_10100239652825871_1574372124177523217_nThere are more spaces than cars in Pffx. That doesn’t stop people from throwing a fit about parking, the distance between cars, and cars that end up parked illegally overnight. There’s even a resident that calls in expired Alexandria county decal stickers to the police, but that’s a story for another day.

And sometimes the stories on Facebook even include photos– those are the best.

This post is a particular favorite of mine:

I found my “neighbor” had called the police because I was parked “too close” to her car (my car is the silver Prius in the pictures.) Instead of doing the decent, rational, neighborly thing to ease her mind, insure that her vehicle didn’t get bumped, and to make my life a little easier, she had called to police to complain about what I believe to be a reasonable amount of distance for a parking job done at a very packed 11PM on Martha Custis when I got home from work.

Let’s get this straight. Before I’m even functional on a Saturday and desperately chugging coffee, this woman starts off her weekend by calling the police to complain a car is parked too close to hers. Because, logic? Boredom? Depth perception issue? That must be it, maybe her glasses are an old prescription.

No damage to the vehicles. No bodily harm or injury. It’s too bad we don’t have a picture of the officer’s expression. That poor officer had much more important things to attend to, for instance, actual crimes and emergencies.

So what did the officer do that any respectable person should do in this situation?


The officer placed a cone between the cars. Because, why not?

H/t to the exceedingly patient man that has to deal with this crazy neighbor, and credit to him for the photos.


One thought on “Because Traffic Cones Solve Everything

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